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Thursday, August 22, 2013

Things I've learned from my children

1.  I say, "Yup" too much.  (repeated by my toddler in much cuter fashion)
2.  My husband says "damn" and "crap" too much.
3.  If you tell a child to get in their damn bed, they will reply that they ARE IN THEIR DAMN BED.
4.  It is very hard to keep a straight face in the face of all of the above.
5. "You won't get so fat if you just stop eating SO MUCH"  (Advice from my then 5 year old... I was pregnant)
6.  It is possible to skate on the kitchen floor if you toss a bunch of flour on there.
7.  Blackberry stains are really hard to get off of the ceiling (or anything else)
8.  Potty training is a marathon not a sprint
9.  It's hard to be 3 years old.  Or 7. Or 9... but 4 seems like a great year.
10.  A certain religious figure, who rose from the dead and ascended into heaven on the 3rd day... might also qualify as a zombie. Technically.

Thursday, April 25, 2013

An interesting article

A great perspective. I think I've almost reached the same conclusion. Yet I still find myself trying to do it all, 90% of the time.  And then deciding that I can't do it all 80% of the time.  And achieving perfect balance 10% of the time.  And giving up completely 10% of the time...   Normal stuff I think.

  I am comfortable with my place today.  I work. I volunteer. I carve out time with my kids and for my kids.  Sure, I don't see what my daughter wears to school because they are just waking up as I leave... And sure, I'm not working as many hours as I could to be move up at work faster.  But this is a balance that is working for me.  I'm there for my kids a whole lot.  A lot more than I could have been in a prior job that was not flexible and had no work from home capability. 
Balance is all you can do :)

http://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/why-women-should-embrace-a-good-enough-life/2013/04/18/4b2b086c-a5db-11e2-a8e2-5b98cb59187f_story.html

Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Tips and Timesavers

In 2013, I'm finally embracing the power of saying NO. I admit, I'm an overachiever. I like to volunteer and I have trouble admitting that I can't do it all. But the bottom line is, I can't do it all! So lately I've been prioritizing based on HAVE TO, NEED TO, and LIKE TO classifications. Work can fall into all three, but I tent to put individual tasks into these categories to help me stay organized. On the home front, the prioritization is key. I hold these truths to be self evident:

 1. What gets attended to, gets done
2. Do it now, lest you forget later
3. Embrace the chaos
4. Do, or do not. There is no try. :)
5. Plan ahead
6. Do what has to be done.
7. Let go of the rest.

In that frame of mind, there are tips and timesavers that can help you succeed.
Personally, I use a day planner type calendar. And I write down EVERYTHING. Ok - I try to at least. I'm not actually anal retentive. At least, I don't think so. I'm just a busy mom who has too much going on to try to remember everything. I need to write it down. I tell my husband, write it down or it didn't happen. ;)

It's kind of like my method of housekeeping. I never used to worry much about putting things back immediately. Now? My counter is cluttered 90% of the time. I HAVE to put things where they belong quickly. At least the important things! Otherwise it will get lost in the paper mountain, never to be found again...

* I use a large bulletin board to pin important paperwork like school schedules, permission slips, song lyrics for a concert, tickets to the circus etc.

* I use highlighters to bring out doctors appointments in one color, important meetings in another color, etc in my day planner and on the family calendar.

* I found the wonderful idea on pinterest to hang clothesline across the wall and use clothespins to hold artwork. I have two of these going. I have a self generated rule that I must take down something when I put something else up. And then either throw away or file.

* Kids papers or pictures that I save go into a hanging folder of my "KIDS, to be filed" initially and later to their individual plastic totes (large size) that I keep in the basement. I wish I could say that I have neat and organized folders by grade or age? But in my house, it's a bunch of momentos piled in there (generally in time order) for the kids or me to explore later. It works for me.

* Homework papers go in another hanging file for each child. I need to do better about sorting out old papers we don't need anymore, but at least we know where homework is!

* Each child has a basket / bin that they keep some toys and books in, for the main family room. They have a toy space elsewhere as well but this is an attempt to keep them neat in the main area.

* As I said in a prior post or two, I use my crockpot a lot. It's a relief to have a meal ready when I get home.

* As I said before as well, I try to keep veggies chopped and frozen for quick inclusion in meals (ie green peppers, diced onion, sliced carrots etc).

* I try to meal plan weekly and make grocery lists at the same time. When time is short, this item slips, as it has been lately. I keep frozen meatballs and jarred sauce, fish sticks, and the whole grain chicken strips on hand for quick meals on nights that I haven't planned.

* The kids do some chores like feed the dogs, set the table, clear the table, empty the dishwasher. We have a chore chart to show who's turn it is, which cuts back on fights. This frees up my time to do other things that need to be done.

* My toddler loves to sweep the floor. I give her the swiffer type sweeper and let her loose. This keeps her from clinging to me while I'm making dinner. And usually she picks up some dog hair at least!

* If the swiffer doesn't work, I like to put her in her high chair with some measuring cups and either frozen peas or cheerios (or both) to pour into the cups, stir and snack on. It works to occupy her for a while :)

* I set my 4 year old to work "washing" dishes. He loves it, it occupies him, AND it usually saves me time washing later.

* I use a rice cooker! I LOVE that thing - set the rice and hit the timer and forget about it. Easy cleanup.

* I have personal email on my phone. I know this isn't for everyone, but there is NO way I'd be able to handle what I do, if I was needing to login to my home computer every night. It just wouldn't happen. This way I can check in periodically during my day and respond to teachers, coaches, PTA etc.

There are lots of areas that could use improvement and I continue to learn every day. But these are a few items I think I do well. :) Leave me your tips and strategies!

Friday, January 4, 2013

I know I've been gone...

I know I haven't been posting and I have to apologize to my few followers (thanks by the way) for my lapse.  It all boils down to me not understanding or having the time to try to understand how this new version of blogger works! haha.  Basically my old version of Internet Explorer is causing trouble. And my Mac version of Safari wasn't doing very well either.   So needless to say, I've been gone. 
However, in light of the end of a year of challenges and the opportunities in front of us for 2013, I felt a post was necessary.  Please forgive me if my formatting and such is completely out of whack. Forgive the utter stream of consciousness that this post is going to follow.  I promise and resolve to figure this out sometime in the next 3 months. Along with lose weight, eat healthy, exercise, be nicer to my kids and husband, and generally kick butt at work ;).
I've never really experienced a true attitude problem.  Of course, I have atittude challenges during a certain time of the month but I've grown accustomed to that and am self-aware.  2012 brought me attitude troubles almost every day of the month.  I admit I felt beat down and broken. I feared I'd never climb out of the dark hole. 
I realize now that I was suffering from post partum depression, as well as dealing with some bad luck health wise and relationship wise. I didn't recognize myself!  Angry, mean, negative, sad, lacking self-esteem! Who is this person?  The depression put pressure on all areas of my life.  Work was a struggle for me to care enough to get done what had to be done (which I did get done, but not easily).  My husband didn't recognize me either and so we fought a lot more than ever.  My children had to deal with a mom who was no fun and seemed to get frustrated far too easily.  My health was possibly a reflection of my attitude but I spent a solid 2 months in the spring dealing with repeat sinus infections and the awful pain of plueresy.... which I was sure meant I was dying of some strange and horrible disease. Or had broken a rib. Something was NOT right with my lungs.
Finally my husband and I took our long awaited anniversary trip to Europe.  I went with 4 prescription drugs for all my issues, including the depression.  I came home with one.  The wonder and joy of that trip and the reconnection with my husband served me well.  I came home rested and whole.
It hasn't been all roses since that time. The second half of the year has been a struggle as well, with health issues that continue to pile up.  I went on a weight loss journey and started to exercise.  The stress of the holiday season with extra busy work time made me reverse direction and gain back a good bit of weight.
I feared that all of these troubles and my attitude issues (my complete inability to drag myself back into the light of positive thinking that I've had for my entire life before this)... were just a lead up to the end of the world.  In some ways, the apolocalypse would be a relief.  If we all died, we'd be in that better place with no more worldly concerns.  But it was the possibility of living in the dark that was concerning.
The horror and tragedy of the Sandy Hook shootings hit me very hard. I still cannot imagine a world or a mind that would think it's ok to kill or hurt innocent children.  I cried.  I hugged my kids tighter. I still tear up when I think about it. And I'm angry.  I know logicially that there's no value in my anger.  This was the act of a person who was mentally ill and not right.  Logically I know that there are few people who would ever do anything this awful.  But in my heart, I hurt and I'm angry and I want someone to undo it. Or since it can't be undone, I want someone to guarantee it will never happen again.
No one can make guarantees. But we need to make changes to ensure that mental illness is properly diagnosed and treated and recognized AS an illness.  We need to change the laws so that background checks include some kind of flag for mental instability, or a personality quiz to pick up on threat type mindsets.  These are done for employment, why not gun ownership?  There should be education for gun owners on care and storage of their weapons so that a child cannot make a horrible decision in the heat of the moment. There needs to be serious (and God willing, not political) discussion on the best way to execute these kinds of safeguards while still maintaining the freedoms we are accustomed to and require.  I am not willing to sacrifice my right to bear arms and I for damn sure want to be able to defend my home if some crazy person tries to hurt my children.  There must be a balance between these two goals.  There must be a REAL SOLUTION that will actually help the PROBLEM and not just make a good soundbite.  I'm sure that I haven't considered all the angles yet but I think we can all agree that some change is warranted and a discussion must be started.
Coming back off my soapbox, 2013 is looking bright.  We didn't all end on December 21st or at the end of 2012.  We've made it to 2013!!! Hurray!  This means that we can start planning for tomorrow, and looking to our future. We can do anything in 2013. It all starts with our good intentions and us doing something to move forward.  I spent 2012 afraid to step for fear of being wrong or too sad to see the light at the end of the tunnel. 2013 is going to be a year of running forward to meet my goals and get into the light.  I refuse to let the negative attitude return.  There will be challenges and things won't always go the way I want. But I will meet 2013 with hope and a smile and know that it's all possible. I choose happy.  I hope you do too.  Happy New Year!