Tips and Timesavers

In 2013, I'm finally embracing the power of saying NO. I admit, I'm an overachiever. I like to volunteer and I have trouble admitting that I can't do it all. But the bottom line is, I can't do it all! So lately I've been prioritizing based on HAVE TO, NEED TO, and LIKE TO classifications. Work can fall into all three, but I tent to put individual tasks into these categories to help me stay organized. On the home front, the prioritization is key. I hold these truths to be self evident:

 1. What gets attended to, gets done
2. Do it now, lest you forget later
3. Embrace the chaos
4. Do, or do not. There is no try. :)
5. Plan ahead
6. Do what has to be done.
7. Let go of the rest.

In that frame of mind, there are tips and timesavers that can help you succeed.
Personally, I use a day planner type calendar. And I write down EVERYTHING. Ok - I try to at least. I'm not actually anal retentive. At least, I don't think so. I'm just a busy mom who has too much going on to try to remember everything. I need to write it down. I tell my husband, write it down or it didn't happen. ;)

It's kind of like my method of housekeeping. I never used to worry much about putting things back immediately. Now? My counter is cluttered 90% of the time. I HAVE to put things where they belong quickly. At least the important things! Otherwise it will get lost in the paper mountain, never to be found again...

* I use a large bulletin board to pin important paperwork like school schedules, permission slips, song lyrics for a concert, tickets to the circus etc.

* I use highlighters to bring out doctors appointments in one color, important meetings in another color, etc in my day planner and on the family calendar.

* I found the wonderful idea on pinterest to hang clothesline across the wall and use clothespins to hold artwork. I have two of these going. I have a self generated rule that I must take down something when I put something else up. And then either throw away or file.

* Kids papers or pictures that I save go into a hanging folder of my "KIDS, to be filed" initially and later to their individual plastic totes (large size) that I keep in the basement. I wish I could say that I have neat and organized folders by grade or age? But in my house, it's a bunch of momentos piled in there (generally in time order) for the kids or me to explore later. It works for me.

* Homework papers go in another hanging file for each child. I need to do better about sorting out old papers we don't need anymore, but at least we know where homework is!

* Each child has a basket / bin that they keep some toys and books in, for the main family room. They have a toy space elsewhere as well but this is an attempt to keep them neat in the main area.

* As I said in a prior post or two, I use my crockpot a lot. It's a relief to have a meal ready when I get home.

* As I said before as well, I try to keep veggies chopped and frozen for quick inclusion in meals (ie green peppers, diced onion, sliced carrots etc).

* I try to meal plan weekly and make grocery lists at the same time. When time is short, this item slips, as it has been lately. I keep frozen meatballs and jarred sauce, fish sticks, and the whole grain chicken strips on hand for quick meals on nights that I haven't planned.

* The kids do some chores like feed the dogs, set the table, clear the table, empty the dishwasher. We have a chore chart to show who's turn it is, which cuts back on fights. This frees up my time to do other things that need to be done.

* My toddler loves to sweep the floor. I give her the swiffer type sweeper and let her loose. This keeps her from clinging to me while I'm making dinner. And usually she picks up some dog hair at least!

* If the swiffer doesn't work, I like to put her in her high chair with some measuring cups and either frozen peas or cheerios (or both) to pour into the cups, stir and snack on. It works to occupy her for a while :)

* I set my 4 year old to work "washing" dishes. He loves it, it occupies him, AND it usually saves me time washing later.

* I use a rice cooker! I LOVE that thing - set the rice and hit the timer and forget about it. Easy cleanup.

* I have personal email on my phone. I know this isn't for everyone, but there is NO way I'd be able to handle what I do, if I was needing to login to my home computer every night. It just wouldn't happen. This way I can check in periodically during my day and respond to teachers, coaches, PTA etc.

There are lots of areas that could use improvement and I continue to learn every day. But these are a few items I think I do well. :) Leave me your tips and strategies!

What's perfect anyway?

I'm having one of those weeks where I question the expectations I have set for myself and the expectations others have for me.  I'm wondering why can't I seem to do it all? Why is something always lacking? Why do I need to sleep anyway??

I admit that I sometimes enjoy a historical romance novel.  Its pleasant, its normally easy on the emotions and its going to have a happy ending.   I admit that I enjoy losing myself in the somewhat trivial entertainment of a love story fraught with dilemmas of love or circumstances or intrigue.  At the end of the novels, I frequently spend a few moments thinking how wonderful their lives must have been.  How wonderful to just be responsible for a home and my children. How wonderful to have a husband home most of the time and servants to help.  How wonderful to have all that time for passion and tea and cakes.

I then wonder why I have no time for tea and cake? Why do I have little energy for passion? Why do I not go visiting and have time to read in a nook in the library? Then again, why don't I have a LIBRARY? :)

The simple answer is real life.  I have children who need time and attention. I have a house that constantly needs straightening or sweeping or such. I have a job that requires my time. I have volunteer activities that require time and energy.  I have a family to feed, and they want to eat 3 meals and 2+ snacks a day!

Since I am lucky, I have family members to help me clean and care for my children while I am at work.  I don't know how I would truly tackle that mountain of laundry without them there to do some during the week!  Then again, having my kids in my home all the time makes a bit more dirtiness than if they went somewhere... But I recognize the good fortune to have the extra help.

I view life as a big juggling act.  I spend my days juggling work, kids, husband, home, etc and trying to keep all of my "balls" of responsibility in the air.   As with all juggling, sometimes things fall down.  Sometimes certain items are up highest and other items are near the ground. The juggling act requires total concentration and focus.  How am I going to fit everything into my day? When can I mail this? Who will get the dry cleaning / child / groceries / dogs?  What's for dinner?  What homework do the kids need to do? What's for lunch tomorrow? When or how will I do this work project or that one?  On and on it goes.

I'd like to tell you that I have this all figured out.  Unfortunately I'm still on my journey of self discovery and organization!  So feel free to leave me your tips in the comments.  The best I can tell you is I'm not perfect.  I do my best and that's good enough.  Prioritization is key.  What HAS to be done? What can wait?

My other piece of advice is to prioritize time for relaxing and enjoying life.  Its not easy!  But we need to dedicate some time each day to turning your brain off and being in the moment.  We work to LIVE. We don't LIVE TO WORK.  We have children and partners and friends to enrich our lives, and make the overall experience a better, happier one.  If we're constantly cleaning (like we probably would HAVE to be in order to be "perfect") then we're missing out on the good stuff.  We're missing out on playing that game of Candyland or reading that story. We're missing out on laughing with our partner at a movie or show.  We're missing out on good books and cuddles and the like.  It's not worth it.  After all, wasn't it Jesus who told Martha not to chastise her "lazy" sister Mary, as she was spending time hearing his message while Martha was cooking?  Of course someone has to cook or it won't get done! But that's a whole other post for another day.

For me, perfection isn't the goal.  Decent is the goal, with very occasional perfect moments in there.  Once a year for happy kids and husband, clean and organized house, stocked pantry and a beautiful put together me will have to do.  Because the other 364 (or this year 365) days I'm going to be enjoying the moment.  Cleaning what needs to be cleaned, organized what needs to be organized to keep me sane.  And spending the extra moments with my kids and my husband, my parents and my friends and trying to get all I can out of life.

I can learn tricks and time-saving tips and I can improve and grow.  I can find systems that work to get my house reasonable and my life organized.  I can do what I can until 9pm and then commit to sitting down and relaxing for the rest of the evening.  Let's face it, that laundry or bathroom or kitchen sink is going to be there tomorrow and most of the rest of our lives!  But our kids are only little once. And every day we and they are getting older.  Every day is a day we don't get back!  I won't waste it.  I will do what has to be done and I will find that good enough.